Nolan Cain: Fama Semper Vivat

This is a copy and paste of various thoughts I've had today. Tuesday I'll probably start posting the links again. It's been hectic.

Maybe we misinterpret words, lyrics, for that matter. “Always love you, never leave you.” I promised you that so many times. But maybe…maybe this separation is me loving you, and maybe I will never leave your heart. You’ll never leave mine. I’ll always love you.

So as Imogen Heap floats past my ears, I make a silent promise to remember you always. To keep your picture on my wall. To recall our memories and good times as often as possible. To never delete our chat logs from my computer.

I promise and hope to god that someday you will come back into my life.

I find the irony that as you disappear from my life, my candle stops burning.

Get better. Don’t let life burn you out. Find happiness.

Perhaps, dear reader, perhaps we read too far into things, or perhaps we don’t read far enough. There’s a touchy balance, and I can’t find it.

I wish upon tonight to see you smile.

I wish grief and death didn’t hurt this much. I wish the loss of a child none of us had ever met didn’t slaughter us so completely.

It hurts to know you’re out there and I can’t help you. It hurts just as much that you can’t help me.

What I wish for the most….is something you may never understand.

Take me home.